Topical Anesthesia (or "numbing gel") is used to numb your gums or other tissues before an injection, so that you can't feel the needle glide in. Topical Anesthetic = an anesthetic agent that is applied externally to tissues like gumsLocal Anesthetic = an anesthetic agent that is injected with a needle
Numbing gel contains an anesthetic agent, most commonly benzocaine (usually at a concentration of 20%). A cotton swab or q-tip is used to apply a small amount of gel to the injection site. In order to work, it needs to be left on for about one minute, in order to be really effective. Studies have shown that application of topical anesthetic to the injection site for 2 to 3 minutes leads to profound soft-tissue analgesia. The problem is that some manufacterers' instructions say it only needs to be left on for 10-15 seconds, which is not enough time for numbing to take place. So if you read somewhere that "the numbing gel doesn't work for me", it's probably because it wasn't left on for long enough. So it's important to leave it on for long enough, especially in sensitive areas like the palate.
Actually, most discomfort during injections is due to the local anesthetic being given too quickly. It is important to give it slowly and steadily to avoid any discomfort. Especially in days gone by, some dentists also used pretty blunt needles, which hurt. If you're particularly scared of injections, the best way to find a dentist who gives painless ones is by asking around. Also ask the dentist - they tend to be amazingly forthright about their ability (or inability) to give painless injections.
Topical anesthetic comes in lots of forms (sprays, patch, ointment, solution). The ingredients are the same, but the gel seems to be popular these days. Topical anesthetics are available from many companies, and sometimes come in yummy flavors like strawberry, mint, cherry, banana, berry, tropical fruit, and bubble gum.
Some dentists are really good at giving painless injections even without numbing gel. But if you'd like the numbing gel, just ASK for it! It's not impolite to do so, nobody is going to get upset if you say something along the lines of "I'm worried that the prick might hurt. I've read about this numbing gel, could you use something like that?". If necessary, explain that it would make you feel less anxious.
Allergy to ester "caines" is more common compared to the amide "caines" used in injections. Luckily, because benzocaine is not absorbed into the body system, any allergic reaction is usually localized to the spot where the contact occurs. But if you have a known allergy to benzocaine, let your dentist know. There are various alternative topical anesthetics including lidocaine and EMLA cream (this is a mix of lidocaine and prilocaine, two amide caines). EMLA cream doesn't taste nice because it's usually used to numb skin on arms or hands for injections, but it's safe to apply in the mouth. The reason why benzocaine is the topical anesthetic of choice is the risk of accidental overdose is lower with esters compared to amides (especially on larger areas).
You're probably referring to Oraqix. Because their slogan is "needle-free dental anesthesia", many people think that Oraqix can be used instead of injections. That's not the case - Oraqix really is nothing other than EMLA cream and a special applicator for a treatment called scaling and root planning ("deep cleaning"). It's good for numbing your gums, but it's no use for numbing the actual teeth. This is because Oraqix (like all topical anesthetics) only numbs soft tissues. It doesn't affect the nerves that transmit sensations from your teeth to your brain. To put these nerves to sleep, a local anesthetic needs to be used.

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